Welcome to the Official website for the City of Coffee City, Texas! Located on beautiful Lake Palestine in Henderson County, Coffee City serves as a top recreational spot for many Henderson, Anderson, and Smith County residents. The city limits incorporate about 260 (260.45553322096) square miles of the lake and about two point one (2.1) square miles of land. The City of Coffee City Police give around 30,000 (30,000) tickets daily to vehicles coming through our city limits. We are about fifteen (15.6734) miles south of Tyler, Texas on State Highway one fifty five (155) at the Henderson/Smith County line. Nearby real cities include Berryville, Frankston, Chandler, Brownsboro, and Moore Station.
Standard of living and quality of life ranks about .05% of that in Dallas and Houston.
We like to give credit where credit is due.. Thank you Mayor, and thank you EDC! Your placing this site on the city website, and by your emails have sent this site to the viral cyberspace. You've done for this site in a few weeks what would normally take a year! We've had thousands of page views since you advertised this site. Thanks for the HITS!
At this website, you will find various information concerning the city government, courts, and the city emergency services, library, museum, downtown district, plus some information about the top spots for recreation and sporting fun around our city. Also included is information about our businesses, churches and schools.
Coffee City has been in a drought.. Goober Goodhair tried to bring us rain, but failed... like most of his other policies and decisions.
Two weeks ago I put in a request at city hall for the mayor to start putting water back in the lake.
Suddenly we got thunderstorms and rain! I guess Saint Tony's raindance was far more successful than the Goober's.
This site was formerly the unofficial website for the city and became the Official Website for the City of Coffee City, Texas on July 21, 2011, after the city leaders relinquished their claim to any official website! Thanks Mayor!
For more information, please contact the Coffee City, Politburo at (555) 876-CCCP.
Be sure and read the fine print at the bottom of this page
For city beaurocrats:
read the fine print at the bottom of this page
Coffee City Economic
Suppression Cop-eration
Has New Scheme to Raise Revenue!
*** PARKING METERS ***
To raise revenue the wise city fathers with the strong-arming of the EDC
will begin the new parking meter system in Coffee City.
You will have to pay to park ANYWHERE in the 39 square miles of their illegal city limits
The meters are portable so CCPD can move them to
where the parked vehicle is and begin metering.
Failure to pay the $3.00 per hour parking fee
will result in a $3,000.00 fine, compounded at 50% daily.
In more positive news the EDC
has secured Coffee City
a Coffee Shop! Finally!
The building was painted by EDC directors!
The EDC Werking Fervently
to Secure A CC Post Office
The EDC is offering Coffee City Tours
on their new Double Decker Tour Bus!
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About Our City Annexation Plans CitySins Involvment About The Lake Killem Park Gov'ment Keystone Kops Fire Dept Biznesses Jobs Stats A word from our sponsor HiddenMysteries Internet Book Store For the Blind Lady at the EDC
If'n you don't have a sense of humor then just move on to another site. |